Question

短文写作 (满分30分)
假设你将参加某英语杂志社开展的一次征文活动，征文的内容要求你在电视、手机和网络三者中，放弃其中的一个并陈述理由。请你以“Which would you give up: TV, cell, or Web?” 为题，写一篇英语短文。
注意：1.词数120字左右
2. 可以适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。
Which would you give up: TV, cellphone or Web
We are now living in an information age, ……

Answer 1

不唯一
Which would you give up: TV, cell phone or Web
There is no denying that we are now living in an information age, in which TV, cell phones and the Web are widely used. It seems that many people cannot enjoy themselves without them. However, if you had only one to choose, which did you give up?
As far as I’m concerned, if I had to abandon one of them, I would turn off the TV rather than switch off my cell phone or cut off the Internet. I could do without TV because few shows take my fancy and there’re too many commercials. Besides, most programs on TV are also available by surfing the internet. In addition, a TV set is not as easy to carry as a mobile phone or a laptop, as a result of which you can’t make full use of it whenever you want to.
As for cell phones and the Web, they are more necessary to me. I need a cell phone to keep in touch with my friends and family, and almost all information can be gathered on the Internet.
All the things considered, I’d like to choose cell phone or web rather than TV.

解析试题分析：英语写作首先要仔细审题，确定人称，时态，文体。内容要点要全面，上下段要使用连接词做到连贯。我们在写作中应当遵循语言表述的经济原则，即用尽可能少的形式表达尽可能多的语义内容，力求简洁精练。 由于对英语词汇了解和掌握有限，再加上母语对我们思维的影响，写作中常会出现赘词和冗繁的问题。 赘词是指使用了不必要的词语。这些词语只是用来“填空、充数”的，没有增加任何新的意义；冗繁是指对读者来说不十分必要的信息，或句子中重复的词语。 赘词和冗繁使句子结构松松垮垮，使文章冗长、拖沓。因此，我们应该在用词上仔细揣摩，准确清晰地表达我们的思想，剔除冗词赘语，使文章言简意赅。
考点：提纲作文。
点评：考生要尽量使用自己熟悉的单词句式，尽可能的使用较复杂的句子结构，尽量使用高级词汇以便得到较高的分数。比如would turn off the TV rather than ，make full use of，whenever you want to，keep in touch with。考生注意使用过渡词或者过渡句来使文章读起来比较流畅。比如As far as I’m concerned，…As for cell phones and the Web,…In addition.