Question

就“中国首次载入航天飞行圆满成功”这一主题写一篇小短文．

要求：1．行文流畅，叙述清楚，层次分明．

2．内容丰富，材料真实，感情真挚；

3．词数200个左右．

Answer 1

答案：
解析：

例文： The great dream has come true! 　　The exciting and splendid moment has come!After a landmark 21-hour and 23-minute space flight that took him around the globe 14 times, China's first astronaut Yang Liwei returned to the earth safely．When I watched the exciting news on TV, my eyes was① filled with exciting tears．China has realized a many-centuries-old② dream cherished by all the Chinese． 　　As the inventor of the ancient rocket, we fell behind in the space exploration in the modern history．More than forty years ago, USSR(Russia)succeed③ in sending up the first manned spaceship．In 1969, the American astronauts visited the moon． 　　Not until 1970 did China send up the first satellite． 　　Since the reform and opening-up in the 1980's, however, our country has made great achievements in science and technology． 　　Within five years, we succeeded in sending up for unmanned spaceships, laying a solid foundation for the manned space flight．Now, the Shenzhou V．marks a great leap forward in China's space flight． 　　I believe in the near future, China will have the permanent space station of its own like one④ of Russia and China's astronauts will walk in space and on the moon! 　　China, we feel proud of you．China, I love you! 修改： 　　①was→were 　　②centuries→century复合形容词中，名词用单数形式． 　　③succeed→succeeded时态错误． 　　④one→that这里是特指． 点评： 　　作者以真挚的感情，饱满的热情，讲述了中国艰难的航天历程，讴歌了中国在航天领域里所取得的巨大成就．文章叙述清楚，条理清晰，层次分明，过渡自然．值得一提的是，作者使用了一定数量的复杂句子结构，这一点非常可取．但如果作者把自身的感受多谈一点，文章可能会更好．